The first time I saw this documentary film by Gabriel Baur was around 2008 on the LOGO network I think. It came out in 2002 and documents a drag show in NYC of mostly drag kings with interviews with the performers interspersed.
When I first saw this it was the first time I remember seeing a drag king ever depicted. It was certainly the first time I saw a trans man speak on his experience transitioning. I had known masculine women in real life but none who performed as men and no one assigned female who was a man. Growing up I saw people who were assigned male who “crossdressed.” But it never occurred to me that women drag too until seeing this documentary. It opened my mind to the broader possibilities of varying gender expression…that it is complex, not rigid and can be played with.
But when I tried to do drag myself a few years later I was partially dismayed. I wish I had a photo to insert here from me dragging at 20 years old. Picture me with short curly hair and a large bushy mustache on my too young to have that big of a mustache face LOL. Otherwise I dressed up but basically how I was dressing at that time. This was for Halloween/my 20th birthday. And as much as it felt like fun and a validation, it also felt like a mockery of my identity. I took the mustache off and felt heavy dysphoria that week. It was one year later that I asked to be called by a chosen name, not be called “she” and came out as, I think, genderqueer at the time.
Now when I recently watched “Venus Boyz” it reminded me of how far I have really come in my identity. (And how far binding tech/wear has come, thinking of the scene showing duct tape chest binding! Yikes!) There was a time I called myself genderfuck, before genderqueer, before I was identifying as transgender. I was always trans though. And it feels good to be able to say it and not feel badly about myself because I am following my heart and accepting the process of change. Though I was out as transgender before, I felt like I was putting my life on hold by not trying hormones. Not all transgender people medically intervene as part of their journey, and I was one who didn’t think I would. I always remembered this documentary in the back of my mind and am glad I watched it again.
It was funny, thought provoking, heartwarming, inspiring and honestly ahead of its time as a film. It was affirming to watch people with different gender identities, mostly women or assigned female, express their masculine and feminine gender performances boldly. It was affirming to watch trans men loving each other in the documentary and talk candidly about their social and medical transitions. I loved how it showed community building and constructions of families outside the cis-hetero-normative narrative. I would definitely recommend checking this documentary out whether you are trans, queer or not!
Peace,
Kei
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